When we miss someone who no longer loves us, we are agreeing that we are unworthy of being loved. But if we maintain our worthiness, we miss the love we gave, while accepting the rejection of our gift rather than the loss of our love. Endings are elegantly celebrated for the shared glimpses of joy, whereas losses are mourned in the prison of nostalgia.
The biosymbolic processes of endings vs losses are different in their effects on the meaning of our journey. Endings release what no longer is, while losses are hopeless attachments to what never was. Endings gracefully reclaim the rejected gift, and loses confuse the gift with the recipient.
Distinction between the ending and losing I am outlining is not simply an exercise in word gymnastics. It is rather a model for the gift of love based on my theory of existential elegance. I argue that we are incapable of disembodying selfhood when we share the poetics of our hearts as open books. Instead, we offer our commitment, honor and loyalty as gifts to be danced from one embodied entity to another. Daring to share horizons of immortality as mortals. Yet, because of the immutability of our physicality, we can only extend expressions of selfhood rather than the terrain of the expressor.
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